My Back's Against the Wall

When your back is against the wall and you only have a limited number of options from which to choose, what then?  That is the unfortunate place I find myself today.  

On Tuesday, October 17 I was put in the hospital with a severely weakened heart short of a heart attack.  My prognosis was not very bright.  They even wanted to delay heart-bypass surgery until January.  I have now been upgraded to December and I take that as a positive.

So, my back is against the wall.  I have moved from what once was a leisurely stroll through life stopping along the way and sampling life as I chose, to an on-purpose approach with great mindfulness in every decision - every bite. 

I chose what to eat.

I chose how much, if any, to exercise.

And now, my back is against the wall.  If I want to get off this wall, there are some strategic decisions that must be made.  You see, my doctor said this: “I can give you another twenty years, and here is what needs to happen.”

I choose to keep going another twenty years.  I choose to get away from this wall and begin making better choices.  I’ve had my time of free-wheeling and now I get into the game in a better way.  Already, my blood pressure is in normal ranges, my blood sugar numbers are coming down.  I’m finding some amazing foods that satisfy and benefit my body.  I’m choosing better stuff for my life.

This is not a negative post at all.  It is not a ‘poor me’ monologue on my miserable set of circumstances.  It IS a declaration of my intent to spend the next twenty years of my life with a mindfulness that benefits my body. 

Walls sometimes serve a purpose.  You can lean on them for a moment, or you can come up against one, find it an unmovable force, and learn how to come away from the wall with a different game-plan. 

Walls can teach a person a few things.

I’m willing to learn.

P Michael Biggs

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