Thursday, August 26, 2010

Are You Going to Give Up or Get Up?

What an awakening question. Everyone has ‘things’ that come along and knock us off our rocker. The real question is “Are you going to give up or get up?”

In December of 1980 I awakened to discover that a third of my back yard was missing. It had washed down into the ravine behind my home here in Seattle. I had no clue at that moment as to what to do. I wondered if my home was safe from sliding off into the same ravine, however, the bigger question was, “what do I do next and how much will it cost?” Of course I wanted to bury my head in the pillows and not surface for a few months, but I had to face reality. I chose to “get up” and do what I could to remedy my situation.

Here are some solutions for us to use when the wind gets knocked out of our sails.
1. Get a right perspective. What actually happened? What can you do about it? What will it cost to correct the situation? What is beyond your control?

2. Seek out the right people. Who can help you? Who will give you good advice? Who can point you in the right direction? Who do you trust?

3. Plot out a reasonable time line. “Reasonable” is the key word here. How long do you realistically think it will take to correct your dilemma?

4. What can I possibly learn from this situation? There are lessons in everything in life. We need to assess and process to help us gain a new perspective.

5. Remember, this too shall pass.

In the September 2010 issue of Success Magazine, John Maxwell said “It may not be your fault for being down, but it is your fault for not getting up.”

So, it’s time to respond.

Are You Going to Give Up or Get Up?

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Real Wealth

What is your real wealth? Is it a dollar figure that you now possess, or hope to possess? Is it a particular possession that you have or you hope to have some day?

I just reviewed my notes on the book Three Feet from Gold by Sharon L. Lechter & Greg S. Reid.  This quote at the beginning of Chapter 22 grabbed my attention today.

“Remember that your real wealth
can be measured not by what you have,
but by what you are.”

So, what are you? What am I?

When I come to the end of my life, I hope these things can be found in the remains of what I leave behind.

P Michael Biggs was …
A loving man
An honorable man
A trustworthy man
A man of integrity
A man of morals
A man of truth
A good friend to many
An encouraging man

I have “stuff” in my life. I own two automobiles, I have enough cloths, we have plenty of food, I have a modest library and even a Kindle, we've taken a cruise, we’ve visited some lovely places on vacation. But all of this is just stuff to fill up our lives.

What am I at my core, my base self? What are you?

Today, I’m speaking to mankind, whether we are sales people, factory workers, mountain climbers, musicians, housewives, mothers, daughters, sons, fathers, or retired.

May we be found to be people of substance and worth just because we are human beings. Our legacy matters more than money, accomplishments, sales quotas, and awards.

What am I? I hope people find me to be an authentic human being!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Non-Verbal Communication (The Buzz-Word for Body Languge)

How you look overpowers what you say by a factor of eight!

Here are the facts.
Communication is …
7% Words
38% Tone
55% Body language

Most individuals use some 700,000 signals that they give off in day-to-day human interactions, and approximately 250 facial expressions. We are constantly giving and receiving verbal and non-verbal communication in every conversation, passing glance, brief smile and nod of our heads to another human being. Everything we do, from the way we sit, the amount of eye contact we use and even how loudly we speak all send verbal and non-verbal signals about us and our feelings. Our non-verbal signals produce either a sense of trust and interest in connecting with another person or they generate disinterest, distrust and fear.

Eye Contact: Look people in the eye. Avoid prolonged stares and glares, but give a solid look in the eyes for 2-3 seconds, break away and be sure and include every person in the party with whom you are speaking.

Be aware of your own eyes when engaging someone in conversation. Experts in body language and non-verbal expressions are in agreement that when a person visually recalls something, they look up and to the left. When they make up an answer or lie, they look up and to the right.

Hand Shake: If this is appropriate and acceptable in your work, attempt to keep the hand shake up-right. If you tilt the handshake to the left so that your hand is on top this is considered a power play in your favor. If the handshake is tilted to the right so that the other person’s hand is on top this is a power play in their favor. Avoid one-up-man-ship in something as simple as a handshake.

Body Stance: Be sure and use an open body stance, especially when speaking to more than one person. Include everyone in the group by facing them all. When I speak to a husband or wife, I make sure and position my body equally facing them both. So often I see sales people favor one person over the other in a two-person encounter.

Notice the position of your client’s feet when they are speaking with you. There is an axiom in studying body language that says “The feet point to where the body wants to go.” If you are engaged in conversation with a customer, yet their feet point away from you, there is a good chance that you don’t have their full attention and you need to re-establish control so that you can properly help your customer.

Body language speaks louder than words.

Success to you in your pursuits!

Thursday, August 5, 2010


I once had it said to me, “You’re an accident waiting to happen.” Ouch. That hurt. I could have chosen to dwell on that comment and let it color the rest of my life, but at some point I made the conscious choice to move beyond those words and realize the reality that I was and am better than that comment and I wasn’t going to give it a foothold in my life any longer.

Les Brown, internationally recognized motivational speaker, once said, “Someone’s opinion of you does not have to be your reality.”

Thank God this is true.

But how often do we ruminate on past words that someone has offered in judgment on our lives and we have accepted those words as truth?

We don’t have to look very far to find people who will rain on our parade. Parents, siblings, in-laws, co-workers, and so many others sometimes seem willing and ready to take aim at our lives, our conduct, and our situations and offer judgments, pronouncements and opinions of what is wrong and what to do to fix our situation.

But what is the truth?

What is reality?

Maybe you have failed.
The reality is that you are not a failure.

Maybe you have made a mistake.
The reality is that your whole life is not a mistake.

Maybe you have had one or two bad relationships.
The reality is that you are still capable of reinventing your relationships, improving them and learning from your past mistakes.

Maybe you have been miscast into a job that didn’t show your best skill set.
The reality is that there is a job, a work that is perfectly suited for you. Go find it.

From this day forward…
-I will live an examined life.
-I will take counsel with those who have my best interest at heart.
-I will evaluate and improve my life every day.
-I will learn from every situation.
-I will read books that will enlarge me.
-I will learn the difference between reality and the opinion of others.

From this day forward, I will live the best “me” that I can. I will accept my good points, improve my weak points, and live my own reality.