5 People-Skills Keys

Unless you are a hermit living in a hut in the Himalayas you probably need to keep your people skills relatively sharp.  Here are five key points that might help.

1. Listen to People

There is no need to get on a rant about all of our iGadgets and how we ignore others by tuning into these hand-held marvels.  Bottom line, people want to be listened to.  They want to be heard. 

In one of Bob Burg’s and John David Mann’s books they use these words from a husband and wife conversation.  The wife is speaking:

I’ve never been so heard … so listened to.

That is a remarkable comment.  She felt she had his ear.   Gotta love that.

2. Pay Attention

Small children are masters at getting out attention, because they will continue asking until you do notice.  Heard this lately?

“Mommy, Mommy, look at me.  I can swim.”

And if you look away, you get a repeat request, repeated until you do look and pay attention.

Employees want to be noticed for some really good work.  Spouses like it when their special efforts are acknowledge.  We pay attention in our relationships.

3. Look at Them

Have you ever been in a conversation with someone and kept noticing them looking over your shoulder?  It kind of gives us the feeling that we are not very important, doesn’t it? 

Dr. Bernie Sigel tells of some cancer patients who had five requests.

Knock on my door.

Look me in the eye.

Say hello.

Say good bye.

Let me talk first.

I LOVE that.

4. Honor Them

And how do we do that?  Recognize them as a living and breathing human being who simply wants to be heard and recognized for the brief moments you are in conversation.

Remember their birthday or anniversary.  I just celebrated one and was amazed at the number of greetings I received on Facebook. 

Recognize an accomplishment and celebrate that. 

5. Respect Them

Respect them by giving a bit of attention, focus and interest.  We honor people by asking about what interests them, their kids, spouses, jobs, business, and recent successes.  Show interest – honor them.

I wish you much success in all your relationships. 

P Michael Biggs

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