Believe In Yourself (Part III)

Believe in Yourself

Seven Characteristics of Unstoppable People

Part 3 in a Seven-Part Series

Based on the book Unstoppable by Cynthia Kersey

Earl Nightingale said it in his multi-million-selling recording.  The Bible promotes it.  Every well-known and novice speaker and writer who seeks to enrich people’s lives promotes this concept.

What is the concept you ask?

“As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.”

“You become what you think about. “

And there are dozens and hundreds of other ways to say this. 

I’ve heard this concept perhaps ten-thousand times in my lifetime, yet for many years I rushed by it without much deeper thinking and contemplation on the subject. 

You see, I “thought” I believed in “me” yet there were some deeper issues residing inside of my mind that I had to come to grips with in order to set myself free and really allow this concept to sink down deep inside of me.

But it all comes back down to the question of “Do You Believe in You?”

During my growing up years I lived under a stern discipline-minded father.  His word was the law and I dared not step outside the boundaries he established. 

Along the way I allowed my own image of myself to diminish and be ground down.  Oh, I put on a good face for the world, yet I practiced a hollow philosophy of true heart-felt belief in myself.

One fine day along came a phrase that I grabbed onto and it has changed my life. 

The phrase?

I APPROVE OF MYSELF!

For too many years I sought approval from family, co-workers, church members, and everyone else and never accepted me and my goodness and talent pool.  I always deferred to others and their will and way because I felt I had nothing much to contribute. 

The irony of this story is that in my professional life I had some pretty amazing measures of success along the way.  I performed well, people liked me, I could plan and organize events and productions with amazing skill apparently, yet there was this hollow and emptiness inside that I never addressed. 

When I read those four words – I APPROVE OF MYSELF – it was as if blinders fell from my eyes.  I saw with such clarity the damage I had been enduring at my own hand, or rather my inner voice, and from that day forward I have been walking upward and out of the mental hole I had created for myself. 

This is a bit painful for me to reveal in such detail, yet I feel it is such an important concept and I am certain others have struggled in the same way. 

Let me be quick to point out that I am not promoting a philosophy of haughtiness, self-sufficiency or trying to come across in a braggadocios way. 

I am simply relating something that happened deep inside of me and it was a freeing moment when I finally acknowledge that I approved of myself.

I always felt I was …

Too fat

Too bald

Too awkward

Too shy

Too noisy

Too impulsive

Too showy

Too obnoxious

I have a unique gait to my walking and often I’ve been made fun of for that.  Even though I would laugh it off with my friends, I internalized those jokes as something bad and not worthy of approval.

Do you see how these kinds of self—condemning thoughts can do a person in?

The day you begin to believe in your innate goodness is the day you take your first steps toward living a freer, more fulfilling and more sound life. 

Brian Tracy, speaker and writer is famous for saying “I like myself.  I really do like myself.”

That is good and wholesome. 

After all, you and I are unique individuals.  Never has this world seen an exact replica of us, nor will it ever see one after we are gone.  We are created with certain unique abilities and talents and our creator expects us to use all that is within us to design the best life of which we are capable. 

I don’t know if my mantra is the perfect one for you, but I do know that at some point in your life you must accept who you are, what you are and realize that you are all you need to be.  Sure, keep learning, keep reading, keep becoming better, but realize you are you.  You are made as you should be. 

It’s up to you to decide what you are going to do with you.

My advice? 

Believe in You. 

That is what unstoppable people do. 

Believe in you!

Only you can become the best you this world has ever seen.

What Is Your Passion? Part 2

What Is Your Passion?

Seven Characteristics of Unstoppable People

Part 2 in a Seven-Part Series

Based on the book Unstoppable by Cynthia Kersey

Why do you do what you do?  Is it passion?  Is it just because nothing else came along? 

One of the best definitions I found for passion when researching this article is this:  “a strong liking or desire for or devotion to some activity, object or concept.”

Passion is the fire that burns deeply inside and fuels the emotions, creativity and will toward success. 

Marshall Foch says this about passion:  “The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire.”  

Where passion burns, a way will be found. 

I want to write to encourage and inspire others.  I will write books, articles, speeches, blogs and single sentence thoughts in pursuit of this drive of mine.

Someday I will write the blog heard round the world.  I’m already being read in some faraway places like Russia, Afghanistan, England, Saudi Arabia, Malaysia, Japan, South Korea, Germany, India, Brazil, Indonesia and other such places. 

My passion is to offer hope, encouragement and inspiration one word at a time to mankind. 

Passion sometimes is scary.  Robyn Allan says “many of us are afraid to follow our passions, to pursue what we want most because it means taking risks and even facing failure.  But to pursue your passion with all your heart and soul is success in itself.  The greatest failure is to have never really tried.”

Passion sweeps one off their feet.  Now that is some strong something. 

When is the last time you were swept off your feet? 

So, what is your passion?  You have to figure that one out for yourself.  Assessment tests, personality profiles and other such tests can point you in a certain direction but to find the perfect focus for your energies?  Look inside of you. 

Where do your private thoughts take you?  When you are alone, what thoughts are on your mind more than any other? 

Look within to see what makes your heart beat faster and discover the passion for your life.

What Is Your True Purpose? Part 1

What Is Your True Purpose?

Seven Characteristics of Unstoppable People

Part 1 in a Seven-Part Series

Based on ideas from the book Unstoppable by Cynthia Kersey

One of my favorite quotes on focus and purpose is this:  “Define your mission!  Define your mission and stick to it.”

I found this in Winds of War by Herman Wouk.  In this book, Mr. Wouk recounts a scene in which General E. J. Tillet, military author and one of the Commanding Generals for England during WWII, is speaking to the main character named Pug Henry.  Tillet is making an observation about Herman Goring that is applicable to our topic.  He said this about Goring,

“He’s wasted a whole bloody month bombing harbors and pottering about after convoys.  He’s only got till September the fifteenth.  His mission is mastery of the air, not blockade.  Define your mission!  Define your mission and stick to it!” 

Question:  What is your mission?  What is your purpose for whatever it is that you are doing with your life and want to do with your life?

Missions are great.  They help point the way.  They help define who we are, and they need defining.

I have known for years that I am a people person and I love to encourage individuals and groups.  But I kept falling a bit short of what all of that meant.  After reading Acres of Diamonds by Russell Conwell for the tenth time it finally hit me what my defining mission in life is and I gained a new focus with a more defined aim than ever before. 

“What is my purpose” you might ask?

My mission, my focus, my aim in life is to offer hope, encouragement and inspiration one word at a time.  I am doing this in my writing, speaking and the living of my life. 

Often when spending time on Facebook I will catch a peek at something one of my friends is in pursuit of and dash off a note of encouragement to them in as they follow their dreams. 

That is what I do best – I encourage people.

With every person I meet, I picture them wearing an invisible sign around their neck that says “MAKE ME FEEL IMPORTANT.”  

How can I assist you in defining your true purpose?  What questions can I pose that will prompt your thinking along these lines.  After all, these are the very thoughts that unstoppable people use.

Are you unstoppable? 

Here are a few thought questions to guide us in this pursuit of defining our purposes.

-What would you do if you knew you could not fail?

-Without regard to income, what would you do to make a difference somewhere in this world?

-Do people energize you, or do you recharge your batteries in solitude?

-Do you like research or do you like telling the world after the research is finished?

-Would you rather write music or perform it?

Cynthia says “anyone … can achieve their goals and overcome any obstacle, if only they will commit themselves to doing so.”

So, define your mission, and stick to it. 

“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams!  

Live the life you’ve imagined.”  

Henry David Thoreau

Working on You

A wise person once said “The hardest work we will ever do is the work we do on ourselves.  The old adage “Know Thyself” is more important now than at any other time in our lives. 

We are bombarded with advertising of products to make us smarter, more beautiful and handsome, healthier, improve our bank account standing, and on and on. 

So, do we need all of these ads and all that they promise us? 

Who are we really?

That is the heart of the issue, isn’t it?  Who am I indeed.

If you’ve lost your sense of identity, purpose and the essence of you, then think on these things. 

Work on yourself.  You are your greatest asset or detriment.

Where are your thoughts taking you?  Are they good thoughts?  Are they important thoughts?  Are they the right thoughts? 

There is a scriptural admonition that is important for all of us:  “Take every thought captive.”  Your thoughts are what make you, so guard your heart, and guard your thoughts. 

What are you reading?  Books can take you anywhere you want to go.  They open new vistas, new ideas and inspiration.  Be good to yourself and feed your mind with good stuff.

Work at your priorities.  You will have to fight for them.

Priorities are necessities, not wishes.  As you think about your life and your business, what acts today will propel you forward toward success in your world?  The answers you come up with should point you toward your priorities. 

Only you can develop your priorities, so spend some quality time in considering what your priorities are and then map out a strategy for accomplishing them. 

And you will have to fight for them, every moment and every day.

What are you good at?  What is your passion?  If you could do anything in the whole world, what would it be?  What makes your heart beat faster? 

The book Acres of Diamonds helped me and countless thousands of others define their mission, their reason for living.  Once you understand your passion, it becomes a magnet and will continually pull us toward it. 

As Kevin Hall says in Aspire, “We are better at what we are great at than what we are good at.”

Work in your strengths.  You can reach your potential.

This one is tied to the one above – knowing what you are good at.  One of the adages in today’s business books is this:  “work your strengths – hire your weaknesses.”

Study, read, explore your strengths and find ways to be a better YOU!

Above all … work on you every day!

Choose Your Color

If you won a million dollars in the lottery, what color would you use to color your life?

If you were injured in a tragic auto accident and came out crippled, what color would you use?

Someone once said, “Suffering colors all of life, doesn’t it?

“Yes,” came back the response, “but I get to choose the color.”

“I GET TO CHOOSE THE COLOR!”

I love that!

The word we are dancing around is “Attitude.”  It’s not the circumstances in which we find ourselves in life that matters most.  It is our “ATTITUDE” in the midst of those circumstances.

We get to choose the color during our disappointing moments.

During my lifetime I’ve faced stuff that was hard, lonely, and difficult to understand.  .  No one likes going through those times, however, if we can come out on the other side with insight and perspective, then perhaps we can appreciate the “valley of heartache” for what it was.

But mostly, we can choose the colors with which to paint the valley walls.

In December of 1980, I awakened one morning and discovered that a third of my back yard had washed down the ravine behind my home.  At first, I wanted to go to bed, cover my head and never come out again. 

I was worried, and I experienced periods of depression and despondence.  But soon a level head and an optimistic heart prevailed and I began seeing the small steps that could be taken to lead to the larger decisions toward a remedy.

Here is a formula I used:

1.       Process the situation.  What has happened?  Did I cause it?  How serious is it? 

2.      Accept what has happened as fact.  You can’t change what has already come to pass.

3.      Act!  What can I do today to help?  Ask for help.  Find a remedy.  Begin the steps of rebuilding and recovery. 

4.      And above all, CHOOSE a good color with which to paint this experience.  If you are still standing then it is not the end of the world.  Color it as bright as you can allow yourself. 

Maintain an attitude of “we’ll get through this.”  “This too shall pass.” 

Easy?

In a word, NO!

However …

However

In time the situation got resolved.

Life happens.

Color it … WISELY!

Henley captures it perfectly. 

It matters not how straight the gate,

How charged with punishment the scroll,

I am the master of my fate;

I am the captain of my soul. 

William Ernest Henley

Facing a New Year

I’ve been reviewing old blogs, I’ve been thinking for some time now about this blog at the doorstep of 2012 and I want it to be memorable, yet not resort to the typical thoughts I’ve already been receiving in my inbox.

So, here is what is on my mind.

I will endeavor to travel these paths in 2012. 

-I will honor God in my living, in my thinking, in my acting.

-I will find ways to add value to my wife. 

-I will continue reading good and wholesome stuff – books, magazines, internet content

-I will model integrity in thought, word and deed.

-I will write to the best of my abilities.

-I will treat my fellow man with respect, cordiality and kindness.

-I will do a better job of honoring my body and bring balance and health to a higher level.

Do you notice that all of these center on making good choices? 

Choices!

That’s it.  One word that now becomes the focus for my life this year.

I Choose – every day, every moment, every circumstance.

Will you join me in pursuit of good choices this year?

Christmas Wins Again

In Stanley Weintraub’s book Silent Night, I want to offer you an abridged version of the gist of this book.

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On Christmas Eve, 1914, in the beginning days of WWI, a Christmas truce was called for.  At midnight on Christmas morning, all guns were to be silenced for one hour.

On this particular battle field, an entrenched squad of German soldiers faced an entrenched squad of French and Belgian soldiers. 

Moments before, each side had been shooting at anything that moved on the enemy’s side, but for this moment in time, all guns fell silent.

As midnight approached, the night became still.  Snow was softly falling. 

Listen to the stillness.  Take in the beauty of snow covering a barren landscape, and hiding all the ills of war.

As we listen, we hear … we hear …

Could it be?  It sounds like …

Listen.

“Si…  Ho…”  I can’t quite make it out. 

Listen.  Did you hear that?

And then with clarity, one lone German voice sang out “Stille Nacht.” 

The melody lingered in the air, and soon, from the French side you could hear an echo. 

“Silent Night, Holy Night.”

Cautiously, slowly, one lone German soldier ventured out of his trench and made his way to common ground - the middle of the battle field.  And then a French soldier joined him at center point. 

Soon others came crawling out of their fox holes and trenches. 

For this moment in time, these men of the human race chose to put down their weapons and open up their hearts, all because of Christmas.

Before you could say “Jack Rabbit” some food was produced, and some drinks were passed around. 

And grown men, formerly sworn enemies, were enjoying a moment of friendship and celebration with fellow members of the human race. 

They were singing and making merry, offering hugs of acceptance and celebration, showing photos of loved ones back home, and communicating as best they could, all because of Christmas.

Rumor has it that the high command from both sides of this battle field did everything in their power to establish decorum of war-like conditions, but their commands and warnings went largely unheeded. 

Christmas broke out on a field of battle. 

Christmas and all it represents.

Peace on earth, good will to all men.

     Joy to the World!

          Hope has come.

On both sides, the conversations ran like this: 

“Wish we could go home.”

“Wish we weren't enemies.”

“Wish we could live in peace and harmony.”

As the cold Christmas day wore on, the soldiers moved back across their lines of battle, back to their lonely fox holes and muddy trenches, but with a warm glow of Christmas on their hearts and in their minds. 

It is said that later, on Christmas day, ranking officers on both sides continued issuing commands to resume fire, and the firing of weapons did eventually begin again.

But for a period of a few days, the bullets zoomed high above the heads of the enemies on the other side of the field.  High on purpose. 

For how could they fire upon someone they now considered “friend”?

You see, Christmas revealed itself to those soldiers that day on that particular battle field. 

Christmas came to war, and Christmas won.